I Mis-Remember You: The Wrong Song Lyrics We Sing
Today’s post is from our friend HIM.
I’ve gone on record on Bring Back Glam! about how lyrics matter to me almost as much as the music. Sure, the music has to move you. But what are they talking about? I can recall numerous songs that had sweeping solos, grooving bass, and thumping drums. But the song stopped me in my tracks when the vocalist dropped a dumb bomb (written by them, or others). What you are saying—even if it is misogynistic, or fantastical, or supposedly Satanic—matters. Lyrics are part of the puzzle for me. I mean, if a killer Slayer song suddenly mentioned “the horny lil’ red one down below” I would do a double take. Commit to the bit and the song, guys!
So, even if the lyrics are cheesy, are they at least cheesy in that good way? You know, wink-wink, nudge-nudge.
Are they historical in their sweep, or pompous and bombastic in their failure? As in, a tale well told, rather than a “hobbit in a hole” horrible.
Still yet, do the specific phrases make sense and move the song along? Or do they redouble their steps and make things a mess (I call this the Ratt’s “I got the glue to glue you” problem).
Here’s the thing: from very early on, I poured over most of the lyrics in the tapes, CDs, and vinyls I owned. I did it while listening to the albums. But I didn’t always, or couldn’t always, do that. That is partially a result of the RCA vs. Columbia House wars in the early 1980s. The latter released solid packages. The former often skimped out and just provided the cover with nothing else. As a result, I sometimes had to “learn the lyrics” just by listening (and please do recall that this was before the Internet). And just listening imprints an image of what you are thinking you are hearing, absent any sort of printed/visual guide.
So, I have three head-scratchers for all of you. This is what I thought I heard. Or, more accurately, this is what I heard.
And it was wrong.
Very wrong.
Quiet Riot, “Metal Health,” Metal Health (1983):
Quiet Riot - Bang Your Head (Metal Health)
Actual lyrics: “I'm like a laser, Six-string razor.”
What I heard: “I’m like a leader, six grade orator.”
Ratt, “Round and Round,” Out Of The Cellar (1984):
RATT - Round And Round (Official Music Video)
Actual Lyrics: “Tightened our belts, abuse ourselves.”
What I heard: “Timecard elves, amused ourselves.”
Scorpions, “Rock You Like Hurricane,” Love At First Sting (1984):
Scorpions - Rock You Like A Hurricane (Official Music Video)
Actual lyrics: “On the hunt tonight for love at first sting.”
What I heard: “On the hunt for love in Brazil.”
There are others, of course. Bands who I listened to casually but didn’t really care. Others who I only heard on the radio and had a passing interest in. But these were bands I really, really liked. And, for at least a few years, I sang those lyrics proudly and loudly!
Why would I, as a kid, know the word “orator” and/or think that Kevin Dubrow was singing about one who was in the sixth grade? What was I thinking when I assumed that little people were chuckling to themselves as they checked in to work? Why, also as a kid, did I think a German band was hunting for love in South America?
So . . . now you! Which lyrics did you get wrong? Which songs did you sing with pride while butchering what they were singing about?
Trust me. I won’t laugh . . . at you. I will laugh with you. Because this is something we have all done while celebrating the music we love.