Like a jester jangling the keys before the king, Eddie Van Halen has checked into rehab. Five days before Van Halen's induction into the rock n' roll hall of fame. Hours after David Lee Roth announces he isn't "allowed" to perform at the ceremony.
Don't worry, glam fans. Velvet Revolver will be there to make it all better.
Here's the guitar god's statement, released on www.rollingstone.com:
'"I would like Van Halen fans to know how much I truly appreciate each and every one of you. Without you there is no Van Halen.
I have always and will always feel a responsibility to give you my best. At the moment I do not feel that I can give you my best. That's why I have decided to enter a rehabilitation facility to work on myself, so that in the future I can deliver the 110% that I feel I owe you and want to give you.
Some of the issues surrounding the 2007 Van Halen tour are within my ability to change and some are not. As far as my rehab is concerned, it is within my ability to change and change for the better. I want you to know that is exactly what I'm doing, so that I may continue to give you the very best I am capable of.
I look forward to seeing you in the future better than ever and I thank you with all my heart.'"
The glam mistress can't help but wonder if Eddie's porn publicist -cum- girlfriend - cum - rock manager is behind the statement and decision.
If you've been following the Van Halen reunion saga, you know the story is better than an old re-reun of Dallas.
"Who shot J.R.?!"
"What did Sammy say to the Associated Press?!"
Give me a break. Make no mistake, glam fans, Van Halen as a group are rock royalty and it really doesn't matter who is behind the microphone. David Lee Roth had a great ten year run with the boys, so did Sammy Hagar. The way they are ineffectually handling this induction honor is putting a major tarnish on a great musical career.
In his heyday, no one could touch Eddie Van Halen.
I guess that's why I don't understand why Van Halen couldn't get it together for three minutes on Monday night at the induction ceremony. Let Roth sing a little of "Jump." Let Sammy sing a few bars of "Poundcake."
Let Eddie try to play "Eruption," the song that changed the lives of a million guitarists.
I wish Eddie much luck in rehab. It's been a long time coming, and the booze is killing a once great musician.
Sidenote: Be sure to check back tomorrow for a special 100th post celebration!