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This Is Real Life

Presented without comment. Happy Friday!

Reader Comments (22)

bret is slim and very shady. Sorry.
July 13, 2018 | Unregistered Commenterfletch
Scents include:
Desperation Deluxe
Cash Grab Supree
Chlymidian Sunrise
Tour Bus Toilet
Skid Mark Surprise

Gets yours today as supplies are limited!!!
July 13, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterGary
Viva la free market! :)
July 13, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterBob
Hahaha!!! FUNNY Gary (not unfunny Gary), you’re killin’ me, one again and as usual!

Here’s the new expanded line:

Pluie Dorée

Moonlight Marde

Bidet Bouquet

Odeur d’ Commode
July 13, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterMetalboy!
@Mb. 😂😂😂😂👍👍
July 13, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterGary
You inspire me, Funny Gary!
July 13, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterMetalboy!
LOL. I'm all for the free market, but this seems a bit off-brand, even for Brett.

Next up: the Brett Michaels line of luxurious bath towels
July 13, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterBryon
I think he may have already done that, Bryon. At least we know he did decorative pillows, as Al posted that awhile back.

One thing you gotta give $immons ... His licensing deals are way more inspired, the KISS Kaskets in which Dime and his brother were buried seem to lend creedence to that, as well as the sense of humor involved all around — $immons for doing it and the brothers for being laid to rest in them. THAT is the kind of sense of humor Michaels’ deals lack, well, except unintentionally, perhaps.
July 13, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterMetalboy!
This is Pete Evick’s (don’t know if I spelled that correctly) company. Obviously, this is a way for Bret to throw some additional money to Pete while making a few bucks himself.

Still a stupid product though.
July 13, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterBrian C.
@ Gary and Mb - You two are killing me.

Chlamydian Sunrise: Burns hot and drips a lot.
July 13, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterKris
When I first glanced at the photo of candles my eyes averted to the big, bold letters of SHOPBRETMICHAELS.COM... but suddenly my brain (not sure if it was the left side or the right) made me see STOPBRETMICHAELS.COM
July 13, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterGNR
Gary you kill me and MB ---- Kris you took it to a new level.
July 13, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterShawn
@Kris 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
July 13, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterGary
you believe that bret was think of this when he was on the...
July 13, 2018 | Unregistered Commenterfletch
Thanks, Kris and Shawn, but it is Funny Gary (not the unfunny one) who deserves all the credit. I was just doing knock-offs.

Speaking of knock-offs, not only is Evick a mediocre guitarist (I had the displeasure of seeing him POINT BLANK with Michaels when he headlined M3 several years ago), but also a purveyor of all things mediocre.

Now, it seems Brian C. has revealed the culprit behind all of Michaels dumba*s marketing ideas, or at least a conspirator who saw Michaels endorsing all this junk and said, “Hey, I can make a buck off this idiot twice!”

GNR - I wish you hadn’t told me about SH*TBRETMICHAELS.COM ... I’m still getting up the nerve to punch it in, as I know I will be able to unsee all his crap, knowing I’ve seen enough already!
July 14, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterMetalboy!
I've been livin' with Val Jacito light for the past 2 years. The last thing I need when I log onto here is Dr. Valliere making fun of me, again and again and again. Shame on all of you regular posters (and Allyson and Him) who encourage it. Your silence is golden. I used to come here for comfort. Now I'll be Metalsludge...I saw you Nikki in a store recently. You and Rodney were looking fatter than ever. get some Bariatric surgery already. Now that's funny!
July 14, 2018 | Unregistered Commenterfletch
Fletch, you doing okay? This seems to be one of your digressions. Who, exactly, is Nikki? Who is Valliere? And who is Rodney?

And maybe you are right: maybe you should go with Sludge if so many imaginary demons are battling with you on this site (including myself and Allyson). That said, I suspect said demons will follow you wherever you go.

I guess this is my somewhat infrequent attempt to get you to clarify what the holy heck you are talking about.
July 16, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterHim
Him: Val Jacinto is a Sociopath!

The others...Nikki, Valliere, Ronny, ok Rodney. you're right...who are they. It was mean what I wrote and regardless whom it was meant for, I'm sorry. I won't promise that I won't do it again (because I probably will) and mean it on a different, but better version.
July 16, 2018 | Unregistered Commenterfletch
Not sure that clears any/everything up. But I appreciate the reply, Fletch. Seriously.
July 17, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterHim
Eu de Hampton Inn Gym
July 17, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterMetalboy!

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